Girl Tawk! with the Boyz: We Ain't Got No Damn Topic!

In this episode of 'Girl Talk with the Boys,' join the panel of distinguished gentlemen as they discuss various insightful topics. The conversation begins with the idea of reciprocity in relationships and leads into memorable lessons from life, such as the importance of humility, perseverance, and self-confidence. The dialogue also delves into misconceptions about love and relationships. The episode wraps up with an intriguing question: if you could have dinner with three people from history, who would they be and why? Tune in for a thought-provoking and heartfelt discussion.

00:00 Introduction and Opening Remarks
00:38 Meet the Hosts
01:30 Social Media Banter
04:39 Life Lessons and Personal Growth
13:13 Trust and Relationships
29:10 Understanding Reciprocity in Relationships
31:24 Personal Experiences with Reciprocity
36:07 Dinner with Historical Figures
49:00 The Importance of Inclusive Language
56:38 Final Thoughts and FarewellThanks for watching.

Transcript

0:00

if you just keep giving to somebody and they're not giving back, that's not the person for you, they might not be into you as much as you are into them and it's okay. It happens. Welcome to girl talk with the boys for another episode with these distinguished gentlemen Today's topic is we got no damn topic. We just gone from the From our heads and hearts and whatever comes out comes out right guys That's right. So but look before we get started Let's go ahead and introduce ourselves starting with It's your boy. You know who I am. Kaizu AKA K Diddy AKA Kai Carbaby all the way representing the A's. By way of Brooklyn, New York. brooklyn and the house one It's your boy Lee, folks. I'm from, originally from Virginia, but I'm representing North Carolina. Go Heels. Durham City, Let's say where's your book Who the Hoyles? the who? Go Heels, go Heels, go Heels. the apple juice must Durham City, Bull City. I'm sorry, sir. I'm sorry. Blame it on the apple juice. And last but not least who we got. hey, I'm Doc. No big fanfare, just here. Okay, mr. 8000 Yes. Okay. Wait till you get 8, 001. You're gonna have a fit. what? Don't, don't I share how many likes i've had on a comment on a post? You say, have you? have I shared? You shared it with me. Yeah, with you. Would you like to know Doc? How many? 35, 000. Oh, okay. I passed you Mr. 8, 000. Well, you're on way more than I am. I don't do any social media. All I did was comment Now all of a sudden, I don't do social media. That fool, look, he don't. Man, it's Well, well, well, well, only thing I know is everyone who I hear chirping only don't even have 50. 50. 50 what? You don't, you don't got 50. Likes, impressions, nothing. And I know, I know Lee got zero. I know Lee got zero, and I know a lie. That's a lie. Lee got over 200 Oh, shit. from the first episode. Oh, shit. Shut down the show. You know took you a whole damn year to get those 8, 000, son. Hey, you know what? Hey. Take me and Kai off and just put Lee in the center. This Lee's, Lee's MVP. It wasn't like, by the way, it was views. views, Likes. Likes. Whatever. ups. All right Lee got 200. couldn't even, I couldn't even fight back, fire back on that one. Lee got 200. Let's go, Lee. Lee, you're on the hot seat now. Lee's on the hot seat now. He got a whole 200 people. we talking about this, huh people that are listening, but this is what you got to deal with. Let's see put so Lee's last video You got 216. So kai was right Boom. But, kai look, 135 a thirst trap on now. how many, how many times have I sat up here and cared about likes? I gave y'all the story from Jump. Me and Melissa was doing this shit before likes was a thing. that's right And no one likes you. And no one likes you. Jesus loves me. How about that? This I know. You know why? You know how I know? Your It's a Bible, No, the Bible. Well, you don't want me to preach tonight, do you? You doom. know what? 140. He's up to 140 now. Um doc, you don't even follow girl talk, do you? Exactly. All right. Clowns. All right, so we gotta ask questions today. And get some responses so the first question is What is the most important lesson life has taught you who wants to go first? boing, boing. Hit it lee How'd you know that was Philly? You know what I'm saying? Sister from another mister. Here we go, here we go. Let me see. Always remain humble, you know. Wow. For me, you know, when I was young and I started making a little bit of money, uh, my head got too big. And you know, I was pretty much an a hole to some people, but when you lose it, it humbles you real quick. So. Always remain humble. That's, that's something I learned. A to the man I can't see you being an a hole though. Yeah, he was a jerk to me when he first met me. Thought I was gonna have to body slam this dude, man. Yeah, I'm like, who's at that party? Remember who's at that party? I'm not gonna call no names. You remember? My son was there with me. My oldest son. This remember that. I mean, we've been to a lot of parties together. is when you, this is when we first met at the, at our place of employment. But anyway, yeah, about to say, we gotta talk about that, I've witnessed, I've witnessed the jerkness in this dude. Lee where are you from originally Durham? Nah, I'm originally from Danville, Virginia. Oh, Yeah, they got a crime rate worse than New York City. I had a big ass confederate flag. On that per capita basis. Because the same six people remember Danville because that confederate flag, it flies high. you got the same six people robbing each other. Huh? It's the same six people robbing each other. This guy, man, I swear, man. This guy, man. Hey, Leroy, is it your turn yet? No, not yet. I got Wednesday. Alright, give me them shoes. Why don't you lend me them shoes? Lee has um, humility. Which is a good one. You always have to stay humble indeed. I think, I know I'm guilty of it. And life humbles you Definitely does. Who wants to go next? I want to hear what Doc has to say on this one. Mr. Thousand. Honestly, probably the biggest thing I've ever learned is perseverance. Nothing ever, ever can beat perseverance. Because the funny thing is you only succeed, everyone thinks you succeed on the first time. And the crazy thing is everybody thinks that um, success is a one time thing. Success isn't. Success is someone who's tried one more time. And you're gonna have failure. You're gonna have failure. So as long as you persevere, no matter how many times you fail, eventually you'll win. So that's the biggest thing I've ever learned. Success is a destination. Not a, not, no, six, how does it, what's the saying? Success is a journey, not a not destination. Yeah. Or you can say like Aaliyah, dust yourself off and try again. Or you can just say Donnie McLarkin. We fall down, but we get up. Wake it up. Or you can say what Michael Jackson say. You know I'm bad. You know it. You know. How you like me now, baby? Shots gotta stop. Oh, first first off, first off, I don't have, I have to take off, um, get a tank top. So I can't do it. So I'm just going to sit here. I up. Shots fired, folks! Shots fired! Right. Kai, let's see, let's see your words of wisdom. What do you have? My words of wisdom is that the biggest lesson life has taught me was be self confident. I struggled so bad with that early in life and that shit just ruined me. Yeah. if you're, think about it. If you have self confidence and then incorporate the humility and perseverance You don't have to put on a show for anybody. You know who you are. You're self aware. If you're self confident, you're self aware. I'm talking about a self confidence that's built on find out foundational principles, not just being a, you know, a jerk or conceited, high minded individual. So that for me was a game changer. So couple, yeah. So I'll just say this cup, that couple with the, you know, then I picked up the humility piece and then the perseverance piece, no one can stop the juggernaut. No, that, that's, that's a very good point. A lot of people today aren't self-aware.'cause, um, you have no idea. and, the crazy thing about it is there's a saying, there's a, there's a famous quote, if you gotta, you gotta stand for something or you fall for anything. And a lot of people will not stand for something. Everyone wants to ride fence I think so. That's not what we're saying now in America. It's clearly divided. awareness comes from, you know, different things. You could have Lost your self esteem as a child or a, you know, or even as an adult, somebody can wear you down so much that you lose your self confidence. So, the key is making sure that you keep the self confidence and you understand that you. You are enough and that you are better than what others are telling you that you are. That's the key to it. Because it's not something that you automatically have. Oh, without a doubt. You know, people have to pour into you Yeah. and it needs to be consistent. It can't be only when, you know, you do something good, but most of the time you get your ass whipped for doing something bad. Yeah, or a rollercoaster, you're good, you're bad, you're good, you're bad, you're good, you're You have no idea. You're confused as hell at that Yeah. No. And, and that's the, the thing is, is who you surround yourself around, around yourself. Unfortunately, it's true. If you surround yourself with 8 losers, guess who's going to be the 9th? If you surround yourself with 9 winners, guess who's going to be the 10th? Yeah. Skippy. Or people that are just boring to though. You gotta look at yourself and then look at the people around you. Um, because you don't really, you don't really see who's around you until you look at yourself and say, Hey, do I wanna, how do I get better? How do I change my, you know, My lifestyle or whatever, and then you start looking at your friends outside of what you, you know, you see in yourself. And then you go from there and cut everybody off. That's not doing, you know, you justice in life. It's okay to outgrow people. Oh, for sure. Yeah, Everybody's not going to transcend with you Yeah. Which is sad. Which and everybody's not going to want to be pulled up when you reach down to pull them up. that's very true. I definitely agree with That's why, that's why my thing right now, fam, is I am no longer sowing seeds in infertile ground. Because think about it. If I'm sowing seeds in infertile ground, and then the other principle is you reap what you sow, what am I going to reap? Y'all feeling me on that? I know I said I wasn't going to preach tonight. No, what you're saying makes sense. What you're saying makes sense. But the thing is, I mean, personally, me, I always try. I always try to see. Because you don't know what's going to be the catalyst to change, for someone to change. And hopefully, the couple of pearls of wisdom that I give them, or a couple of things I give them, or show them, show them my, my fortitude, um, show them, give them a piece of knowledge, that might be the, that, that might be the thing that says, hey, it turns them around, or gets them on the path to turning around. I mean, that's kind of self, that's kind of me over, over projecting, but you always want to see if you can help somebody be better than what they are. That's my number one goal. Well, what was yours, Melissa? Did she say hers? I Yeah. Yeah, I I just cosigned. Um, So you don't, you don't have one. think, I think, I think the ladies who follow girl talk with the boys would love to hear from the lady of girl talk. I think the most important lesson that I've learned and I'm still learning is you cannot trust everyone. Rewind. Yeah. So, you know, I, I'm always so naive. Like I give people the benefit of the doubt and I trust people and I have conversations with people and then I help people. But they don't always have good intentions. People don't always have good intentions. They will use the shh out of you for what they want to use you for. And then when you need something, or you need, you know, a little bit of help, they'll be like, I pray for you. Well, Don't lose that. Don't lose that. The reason why I say that is because when you stop being open to people and stop wanting, wanting to see the best out of people you get very cynical. And I hate to say it, um, being from New York, um, I expect you to steal from me. I expect you to do something jacked up to me. And then when you don't, I'm, I'm happily, I'm surprised, I'm surprised. But when you do, I'm like, okay, I'm okay with that. And that's not the way to go through life. The way you, the way you're doing it is way better. In my opinion, it's way better. Don't lose that quality. Always look for the positive in people. Always look for the good. I mean, unfortunately, when I, just being from where I'm from, you just say, hey, I know this dude's gonna steal. Oh, he stole. Alright, point proven. yeah, I mean, we're, well, three of us are New Yorkers here and I understand watching your back and stuff like that, but. When you're in a circle with someone and you've, you think that you've earned their trust and you, they've, and vice versa, and then they turn around and stab you, that's a different type of pain. Like that's a different type of betrayal. That's what I'm talking about. and you know what the funny thing is? And that's tough. That's tough. But that happens to everybody though, unfortunately. Yeah, I agree with that. I was going to say, um, never stopped being, I'm just gonna piggyback on what you said, doc. I would say, um, just never stopped being a good person. I mean, in general, because even though that person did something bad to you in return of, you know, your, your, whatever you did in kindness, um, I, you're still going to get a blessing from it, right? Regardless of whatever happens from, What good deed that you did to this person or gave this person, whatever happened, uh, you're still going to get a blessing in return. So for me, I try to be a good person in general and stop looking for things in return. Because once you look for things in return, you're, you're, you're not, you're probably going to not get your blessing the way you think you're going to get it. Just, just be open and just say, Hey, I, I'm doing it out of the kindness of my heart. I don't care about, you know, anything else. And I guarantee you, once you start doing that, you'll get a bigger blessing. Bigger than what you thought you were gonna get, so. yeah. But I think, let me, let me say this, Melissa. Uh, I don't, I want to make sure we're not missing her point. I don't think she's saying that she wants to stop being a good person. I think what she's saying is. She needs to use better wisdom and who she gives it to. You know, right. you can't, um, cast your pearls before swine. Yeah, I know what you're saying, but the thing is though, you don't know who's good, you don't know who's bad. So my whole thing is, you can't figure out, hey, I but in the process of building the relay, you just don't, you, we, the relationship that us four have on this call, the corporate on it, on the call, son, on the podcast, you know, we've built a relationship that we trust each other and we haven't ever jerked each other around. And, and we've, and we show characteristics and qualities. That, you know, indicate to me, especially that I can trust all of y'all with my life, with my deepest, darkest secrets. And I know it's not going to end up on IG. So as you build, as you build a relationship and you get to know people that are doing that, you have to cut them off. That's true. that's fair. That's a You look at it, just look at our circle fellows, you know, just the, so now we've talked about this circle on the podcast. Now look at the circle and not the fellows text thread. Yeah. We all look, when we get together, we don't ever talk about. How many women we smashing? How many VIP tables we don't board up? We don't ever talk about that. We're talking about stocks. We're talking about investing in real estate. We're talking about starting businesses. Think about all the times we spent together and how many times did we sit around and share, you know, stupid sex stories, which is dumb. But you gotta understand, you gotta understand, there's a maturation process. And you gotta understand, we've been, a lot of us have been with each other for 9, 10, five, at the minimum five years, at the maximum 15, 20. So you got a maturation process where things grow. Like I've, and the crazy thing is, like I've, like I've, I've grown to know all, a lot about Lee. And the crazy thing about it is he's a scary musician. Like he knows he, he can listen to beats. He knows the beats he knows. And the crazy thing about it is we drove home from Atlanta one time and he was just showing me how many different songs are sampled from songs from the 60s and 50s. And I'm, I'm blown away. I mean, a lot of Jay Z's stuff is not even, it's not even current. He steals a lot of music, which is Damn, so Jay Z is a thief now. Damn, son. You know what? You know what? You really need to They coming, they coming for you. All those 8, 000 views, it's gonna be negative. They gonna remove all them views, Jack. yeah, him, him and Diddy. Him and Diddy. Yeah, they pay for the samples though, right, bro? They don't just steal them. Yeah, but the thing is though, you gotta understand, but there is actually one song, that Girls Girls Girls song. He steals that almost verbatim from another group from the 60s. Yeah, but that's, that's, that's a lot of people who do that. So Oh, yeah, I know. But the I was about to say, I would have known. I mean, I know, but the thing is, though, I thought he was a lyricist. I'm like, man, this is genius, man. I can't believe he wrote this. And I, and you know what? He didn't. I What's the old adage? a lot. I listen to old school rap, but there is a um, Jay Z and Kanye song where they use Otis Redding sample. Mm hmm. She's And I mean, I was like, Oh, this beat is sick. Like, you know, jamming it. I asked my daughter, Hey, you ever heard of this song? She said, yeah, three years ago. you know, do you know, do you know what the funny thing about it is? When you, when you listen to stuff like that, it makes you go back and study like Otis Redding. Otis Redding was a very dynamic musician. I mean, like, and the crazy thing is, like that Ray Charles movie, I never knew this dude put out so much Music, right, yeah. right I'm, oh, Ray Charles is a monster. Oh, definitely And then, and you think about it, he was the first artist to get his master's. Mm hmm. And the Yeah, he sure was, know what? There was actually a line in that movie that's very prophetic. He goes like this, he, uh, he goes, he looks at him and goes, hey, I want my master's. And the guy looks at him and goes, nobody ever gets his masters, not even Elvis. And he looks at me, if you want me, that's what it's going to take. Now, how, how, and the crazy thing is now, what kind of man that you talk about confidence, you talk about perseverance. I mean, that guy is the epitome of strength. When you sit there in that office, where he's from, what he's no, what he knows, and he's blind, he can't see anything. And he, and he goes over and says, Hey, I want my masters. And the funny thing about it is, his family is set up for so many generations. I mean, it is unbelievable. Every single time you hear a Ray Charles song, his family's making money. Yeah I mean, which is crazy. This guy had to, he, he had the fortitude to say, hey, I want my masters. Most guys would be like, hey, I'll just take this. I'll take this. I'll take this. And not only that he had the fortitude to not use his handicap as a as a a hindrance Well, he had, he had a tough mother. His mother was a tough woman, tough woman, But, you know what? She made, she made a guy. And you think about it, this guy's walking around New York City. Imagine, you're blind and you're in New York City. I mean, that's crazy. I Nobody was messing with Lil Ray Charles, come on. come Nobody was gonna mess with Ray Charles. Kai, you know, Kai, you know, you know better than anybody else. In New York City, walking down the street, at half the time, this guy didn't even use a cane. He did not, I don't know what new york city was like in the 60s Right, yeah, during his time? It wasn't, it wasn't, please, come on. I don't think it wasn't you had the mob and all that but it wasn't I think back then, I think back then, the artists had a lot of more, a lot of respect. Somebody like Ray Charles had respect. I don't think people would. Nowadays, you got these clowns out here, you have an artist, they gonna try him. Cause they wanna be that dude to try this artist. You know what? I don't even know. I don't, I don't, I don't even understand that. I don't, I don't understand that at all. All right. Let's bring it back in Yeah, we done went all the way off it back in bring it back in we all got no damn We ain't got no damn How we, how can we go off a topic we don't have? Ha ha ha! Okay, back to you, Melissa Ann. That's right. Say it it back. What'd I say? We ain't got no damn topic We sure damn ain't got no damn topic. All right. All right. So the next question Is what are some misconceptions you have had about? love l o v e Which man So misconception. Oh, common, oh, most common for me? That, that love was just a feeling? When actually love, love was a choice, not a feeling. You choose to love, you choose to love, you choose to love your spouse, your mate, your partner. not going to like them all the time. So, what is love? What is love? to you Well, love is defined as a strong and ardent, genuine concern for the well being of another person. Let me repeat you believe there's a difference between love and being in love I think, I think love, I believe, I don't, I don't subscribe to the, I love you, but I'm not in love with you. know what? You gotta They're different. There are different levels. Let me finish. There are different levels to love, right? And the top, if we were to put love in a hierarchy, the top is agape love. And so that's the definition I just gave to you guys, the strong, ardent, genuine concern for the well being of another. Whether you like them or not, you might not like them as a person, but if they fell down and hurt themselves, would you help them up? And that's, you know, that's a real mediocre example. No, it's not. It's Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. See, you know what? That is an honest, that's an honest aversion. I mean, seriously, if you, if you saw someone you didn't like fall, would you stop and help them? You know what? talking about relationships, by the way. If you, you're in a relationship with somebody, don't, don't, this is not like, um, where it's your best buddy and they fall and then True. That, yeah, yeah, you're right. You're right. This is about relationship. We need to bring, we need to bring it back to the relationship. Okay, relationship is different. Relationship is different. Yeah, Yeah, I think the same thing applies. I mean, here's what I would say. Just because you're not with someone doesn't mean you stop loving them. I agree with You can, you can love somebody and be incompatible love. There's love and in love, in my opinion. Okay, and I believe people are entitled to that. I don't see anything wrong with being entitled to that opinion about love and in love. Yeah. I think you can still love the person and you're not, that you're not with them, but you're not in no longer in love with them as time passes. That's fair. Anybody else? reciprocity. I would say reciprocity for me, um, just because you so for me, and it goes back to what I said earlier, you know. It's kind of me, you know, going against myself when I say this, but if I do something good and if I'm in a relationship with somebody and I do something good, I expect something in return almost because I'm doing it, but I'm doing it because I want to do it. How can I explain this? No, you're doing good. You're doing good. Keep going. You no, because it's like, you know, you're doing it because you want to be with that person and you don't want to. Keep pouring into that person and not pointing back into you. That's That's why I said reciprocity. So you expect something in return, but you don't want to basically tie yourself out or just give all you can to somebody and they're not doing nothing back in return, but Well, I'm not fine. I'm not understanding what, you know, what's the misconception there. Oh, because I mentioned not, not remember I said earlier, I was saying, you know, you do kind of things with certain people, but you don't want to expect anything back. That's why I said, um, I'm kind of like a hypocrite in this case because I Well in my head I was thinking it was kind of like spade you Okay, same thing. No, but I'm not, I'm still not following joking. But what I was really thinking was. It doesn't have to be, um, tangible things, Well, he's kind of, he's kind of making it like a quid pro quo. Like, I've done this. I've done this other than this. I'm expecting this. but couldn't it be just a thank you or showing an, yeah, oh, no, no, he's appreciation. It can be appreciation, but at some point you're like, all right, man, I've done, no, no, no, Lee's keeping score. well, give us an example. Maybe I'm not following because I Because I'm not following the misconception. All right. Do you want them? Let me explain it for you. Like Lee is thinking and I'm going to tell me I'm from wrongly, but I think I got you on this one. Like say for instance, Lee makes her breakfast in the morning. He does the dishes and he walks the dog and he cleans the house. He's expecting her to be doing something like he's not expecting to thank you. He's expecting her to do something, maybe not as grandiose, but he's expecting her to do something like maybe take him away for the weekend, you know, doing a special thing he likes to be done to him or, you know, rub his back. He's waiting for something to come back. He's keeping score. And so, so I'm gonna challenge that process a little bit because I think reciprocity in relationships should be the norm. One person, one, I think reciprocity should be the norm. If, if look, if I'm again, sowing seeds into infertile ground, if you're the type of person that likes reciprocity, then you need to be with somebody who's going to give that to you. Oh, you're But if you're, if you're good, if you're good with just acting and acts of service in the relationship, and that fulfills you and gives you energy and not getting anything returned, doesn't bother you, then that's okay too. But if it's impacting your happiness and your, you know, your comfort in the relationship, then you need to think about and challenge that. That's very true. I don't say, I don't say anything wrong. Now, if, if you, if your intention is every time you do something, you're doing it to expect something in return, then that's a different story. Then that needs to be challenged as well. No, I don't think, I don't think I expect every single time but You expect things to stop. Exactly. Exactly. Cause you I still don't see the misconception, I think is a was not being said. It's a level of care. Is that other person showing that they also care he's showing that I care and I've invested in you, but you're not showing me the same thing back. but what's the misconception there though? That's the part I'm getting to. well, I mean, Maybe you just don't use that word. my whole thing is I understand what Lee's saying. No, but no, but what Lee's doing is, what Lee's doing is he's I didn't know we could do that. No, Lee's keeping a score. got no topic. This guy thought an engineer came straight on out. Well where is the misconception? Analytical asses. No, I'm just, I was just trying to understand, son. I don't want to just be like, uh huh. Yeah, right. Uh huh. Right on. Right on, bro. no. And Lee, and the funny thing about it is, I mean, I understand where Lee's coming from, but you know, I look at things a little bit differently, you know, I mean, technically what I'm about. It's just that I give, and I don't, I give it to you without expecting it back. So, if you give me something back, great. I give it to you because I wanted to give it to you. I never, I never Give it to me. Don't say that with me. I wasn't saying it to you, son. Don't say it around was just doing background. Right Don't do background, foreground, sideground. No, Can't say, you can't say nothing no more in this So Doc, you will date someone and just give and give and give no, no, it comes to a point. It comes to a point where I'm like, hey, I'm giving and no one, and I'm not getting anything returned. So, hey, it's got to stop. You know? But That's what I that's pretty much what I was getting at, yeah. But you know what the thing is though? I mean, like a prime example, Like when we all hang out together, Like Kai, me, I mean, Um, and Larry. We all get together. joke. That's is Lee. inside joke. No, I'm joking. But the funny thing about it is, Is that if Kai gives me money, There's nothing, oh man, I gotta pay him back, Or he's keeping track, or if I give Lee or Kai money, No one's keeping track. It's not that deep. My whole thing is is just that, a dollar to payday? yeah, for the record, for the record, for the record, Doc has never given either of us money, nor have we ever asked. Because we are all standing on our feet with great jobs with great pay. Just to make that clear. Oh, and you know what? I'll give you, I'll give you an example. I'll give you an example. Like Kai is a real giving guy. Like we'll all be there and he'll order like four or five pizzas. So I'll come up and give him like a 30, 40, 50 bucks simply for the fact is cause I know he's doing it out of the, out of kindness of his heart. He's not saying, Oh, he gave me, he gave me, we just do that. And that's what I, that's what I, that's what I'm talking about. Yeah, but again, we're going away from the relationship piece. Your relationship is if I keep, if I keep giving, if I keep giving to a girl and she stops giving and she's, and she doesn't show any reciprocation. Well, I've never done, I've never had that happen, but I'm just saying, if you just keep giving to somebody and they're not giving back, that's not the person for you, they might not be into you as much as you are into them and it's okay. It happens. Let me give you an example of the kind of reciprocity I like. So I, and we, everybody knows I love to cook. And you know, there was a time where I'll wake up Saturday morning, yo fellas, I'm having a cookout. Be here by two and everybody would show up. And let's just say, you know, I had a young lady as a guest. Now, if that young lady says, I'm going to wash the dishes. You go to bed since you cooked all day. That's reciprocity for me. Yeah. That's all I'm saying. yeah, I And you know what? And the funny thing is, you want that from everyone you deal with. Because like when Kai says, hey, come on over, bring something. You know? You're expecting, I mean, everyone goes above and beyond to bring stuff. So it's like, there's way too much food, there's way too much drink, there's a lot of stuff. But that's a good thing. And sometimes you don't even say brainy thing. I just ask like, hey, you want me to break something? a function where he's asked you yeah. But the thing is though, we have that kind of relationships where, You're, I mean, it's just like, hey, I want, I want to add, I want to contribute. And that's what, that's how it is. Now some people, some people don't do that. And those people are no longer in my circle. yeah, but the thing is though, but Yeah. Yeah. Look, look, you know, but you also don't have that I mean, I need, I have to have that. Yeah. I But what you don't, but you don't have the same relationship. You don't have the same relationship with those people. That's why they're no longer in the circle. So I have this much relationship with them. See that? Hello. Hold on. yeah, This, this, this many makes sense. Kind of Atlanta, get some of that, um, the Brussels sprouts. I hate Russell Spence. Copy on the ones and twos. and the threes and fours, baby. Don't All right, say that either. here goes the last question. Maybe, because we ain't got no damn topic. If you had the opportunity to have dinner with three people from history, who would they be and why? Go start with you, Doc. Um, honestly, the first one I'd want to speak to is Sun Tzu. out of war Yeah. Because just the way he looks at things, um, is just amazing. And believe it or not, the guy who I really would like to speak to, Josiah Henson. Who? Josiah Henson. Everyone knows him as Uncle schools, uncle Tom. Right, right, right. the funny thing about it is, if you understand the story of Uncle Tom, calling someone Uncle Tom is actually a positive thing. Not so much because that guy was based off of him. The guy was very dynamic. Very dynamic. I mean, it was amazing some of the stuff he did. And, and possibly, I'm trying to think, probably the third guy I'd want to speak to, because I've been listening to a lot of the stuff he says, is Malcolm X. And because, not so much from where he ended up, but from where he started. And then once he started, then he got the mind shift. And then once he found out, what the Nation of Islam and what Elijah Muhammad was doing, it kind of threw him off. And some people, that kind of threw him off. And he's like, no, I'm still going to stick to my guns and what I've been doing and I'm going to stay on the path. And then when he went to, then when he went to Jerusalem and he went down there and he learned from, Who's went to Mecca. We all saw the movie. No, no, no. It's not, no. If you read, read some of the stuff he wrote, You can leave. if you, honestly, if you read some of the stuff he wrote, it's very interesting. He had a, the funny thing about it was, the thing that changed his mind was that you had white Muslims and you had black Muslims. And he didn't realize that the white Muslims were sitting, standing, um, laying right next to the black Muslims praying to the same God. That's what threw him off. And that, Yeah, he talked about them having blonde hair and blue eyes. yeah. But the thing is though, he goes into the whole thing. Very interesting man. And the crazy thing about it is, a lot of the stuff he was speaking about in the 50s and 60s, we're still doing right now, which is probably really, I mean, just the maturation process. Those are probably the most three people I'd probably like to talk to. Okay, up next? up next, man. This is tough. I went first on one of the questions. I'm gonna go last. So I guess Kai's up. What about And Yeah. Melissa. Yeah. What? I trade all three of those to have dinner with my mother. I was thinking of my grandmother. Cause I remember, I would say my grandmother on my mother's side, because I was very young when she died, but I remember to this day. I remember that she loved me. I can just still feel it on me. You know what I mean? And when I talked to my family members. Oh, they were like, Oh yeah, she, she loved you. She loves some Ki. So I remember that. And then I also remember when she left New York to move to North Carolina as a kid, I felt something bad was going to happen. And not long after that, we got the phone call that she had passed away. So if I could go and have dinner with her and just kind of get, you know, a brain dump of that love, that would be good for me. Uh, number two, you know what? If I could meet Jesus. And one moment, no, listen, here's why you can, you can still say Jesus. You ain't got to say, don't use Jesus, Jesus, baby, but in the garden of guests, no, in the, in that moment, when he prayed father, if it be thy will, let this cup pass from me. We all gonna see Jesus eventually. Well, but this, I thought we had no topic, Excuse me, she didn't say we got no time here, but she got rules. Obviously she got rules. but we ain't had no rules with the misconception question that was, but anyway, I w I would want to know what, what he was going through in that moment, because think about it. He knew what his mission was when he came. But he who became, you know, God or, you know, God in the flesh still prayed if, if there's some way that we can get out of this father, let it happen, but nevertheless, let your will be done. So I want to know in your human body, Jesus, what were you feeling in that moment? Okay. Yeah. God damn. Going way down deep. Now for you, cause you know, I was sitting on my patio one day and I was, I believe I was talking to someone and it just hit me. I was like, you know what? Jesus prayed to let the cup pass from me, like the mission I came to earth to do. If you can make it do something different to get the same result, I'll rather do that, but still let your will be done. What were you thinking? Jesus in that moment? Cause I'm thinking like if, if he can pray that prayer, who are we when we go through shit? Give you we got to give ourselves permission to be human all the time. Yeah. And that, and that, and that was his human side. That was his human side, you know what, because anytime, you know, you got to face something really tough, you know, stuff is going to get thick and it's going to be deep. You're like, man, if I could, I'd like to let this go. But, but sometimes you know ain't gonna, you know you gotta go through it. And you gotta, you gotta go put in that work. You know, I'm the third person my biological father. I never knew him I would love to sit down and ask him why he cut out on my mom's Oh, Is he still living or I haven't I've never met him I've never talked to him. I have no idea where or who he is Melissa. That's why I would love to sit down and ask him What was it that made you just cut out? It's completely Swayze ghost. That was my three over to you. Lee, yeah, top that. I know, right? Top that. You know, I, I'm not gonna lie, two of yours were, were something, uh, I was thinking about, but, let's say a my, my, my first one would be, uh, Tupac. Um, because he was overall artist. I like, I like him because, you know, he was a, he was a poet, he was an actor. He wasn't the best lyricist. But he motivated people in his lyrics. Um, you know, as I got older, I understood how he was preaching in his lyrics. He would basically elevate his voice to sound like he was preaching in his lyrics. And that's how people gravitated towards his lyrics. He wasn't like, you know, uh, like a biggie where, you know, he was very clever with his words or whatever, but, um, that was somebody I would want to get to know as far as. Why he did what he did. Um, why do you start to be for, you know, different artists here and there. Um, and then get to know his, his, his overall black Panther history side with his mom, um, and then the stepfather and all that stuff. So I think that would be a, and on top of that, he grew up in Baltimore. So some things happen in Baltimore, but, um, yeah, I think it would be a great, a great dinner and get to know him in general, um, to get his side of the, you know, certain step, his stepfather actually, his stepfather actually, committed a crime in New York City. He robbed a, he robbed an armored truck. And the crazy thing is, that's like 15 minutes from my house when he did that. And he was born in jail. So, yeah, yeah. Um that's who was born in jail? Two o'clock. His pack. in jail for him in jail. Yeah. I didn't even know that. Yeah. heart. Black Panther. I got it. I got to go back to brother's school, man. She was, she was, uh, she, no, no. But she, she got herself in court and won and was released. Yeah, yeah, my second person, honestly, I was gonna go with my father cuz I never knew my father as well. Um the first time I met him was in a casket. And that's how I got to know my, my half brother with my brother and my sister. But, you know, I'm a, I'm a shift a little bit. Um, you know, I like to read books and I like poetry. So I'm gonna go with Ernest Hemingway. I heard Ernest Hemingway was a troubled person. Um, he actually was, he served in the army. He actually got, I think he got shot actually too. Um, And he actually spent a lot of time in Cuba, which I visit his restaurant. Um, so it was, it was dope to like, hear some, some of the stories and, and to, uh, actually, in Cuba. yeah, he has a statue still in Cuba of him. I have a picture with me as a standing beside him. Oh, So yeah, El Floridia, I think that's what it's called. So, know that. Brothers. Do y'all brothers be knowing a lot of stuff? I just know stuff. Well, there's a sister on the phone. the most, The worst, the most dangerous thing you can give a black man is a library card. That's for sure. That's true. There's also a woman on the phone. I know some stuff. Thank you very much. in, you're lumped in with mankind. So, so I but yeah, Ernest Hemingway was, yeah, he was a troubled person. Like he pretty much was alcoholic in his later years. And I just want to know like what caused him to drink as heavy. I'm just curious. You know, you, you only getting certain sides of his overall life, but I want to hear from him, what is really going on? Why did you do what you did and this and the third? So. That'll be my second person. And then my last person would be, of course, you know, Jesus Christ, because for one, I would want to know what happened between your teenage years to 37. There's no Third, third, 33, excuse me. 33. He didn't live to 37, bro. 33. I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm close to 37. So that's why, you know, but yeah. There's no there's no no information in between that time. So I want to know exactly what happened. Um, Yeah, and just get inside the story plus, you know, if we already had dinner We don't gotta pay for drinks because he could turn the water to wine. So True that. True that. That's my three right guess, so I guess it's not gonna be a show unless we blaspheme the good lord. This fool said blaspheme the good Lord. No, I'm done. Yo, I'm finished. my last podcast. Melissa can't with these fools. You know what? We completely lost Melissa. You got a completely straight face. I know she ain't even laugh, smirk. You know what? You got the mom face right now. She's the, she got the mom face for real. You don't know. You're just like this. I can't believe I'm with these dudes. I don't know what these guys are doing. Oh, Well, that brought the Gemini out when he said we lump you in with mankind. The other twin came out. So, I had to hold, I had to hold my tongue. Well, Melissa, you know, a lot too. You know, I tell you that compliment you all the time on that. I didn't compliment them to leave you out. I was just giving the boys a compliment. No, that's not what I mean. Oh, what you mean? When he said we lump you in with mankind. I didn't like that. I'm sorry. Apologize, doc. He just did. He just said it. sorry. And that was genuine. I know. I know, I didn't mean it bad. I didn't mean it bad. You know, they don't say womankind. Mankind is everybody. They just say womankind. Who says womankind. No one says womankind. They do! No! In the united states, what do you mean? They do What do They say now? It's not inclusive now She her it Is you can't we go. Here we no, no. Mankind is supposed to be inclusive. It's just inclusive terminology. It is. It is. They. Them. you can't say mailman It's mail person I'm a child. I'm a I mean, I said letter carrier because I know them, but is it? That's not What? What? Letter carrier? That, All that stuff. Yeah. Like, police. It's not policeman. It's police officer. It's not a fireman. It's a firefighter. Check this out. We couldn't even call it a cockpit anymore. In the military, I was Navy, worked on F 14 Tomcats, and it had a cockpit. But after a certain point, you couldn't call it that. You had to call it the flight station. Right. Right. Okay, cockpit is women because women started flying airplanes in the military. Yeah, I mean, but some of these terminologies, I get you have to make things change, but people don't say that to be derogatory, to be mean. I mean, it's It was just, a man's world It was just a man's world and the men made man terminology and now the terminology is changing. It's cool Yeah, but it's not, but it's not, but it's not a negative thing. Yeah, but some people feel like it is so you have to be inclusive Just have to yeah, we said it earlier do unto others as you have them doing to you That's part of that's part of being nice doc. You said be nice I am being nice. Oh, I know, but sometimes it's not meant to be mean. When, Yeah, but it's but we live in a sensitive world and if and if that's a sensitive subject for her or anybody else We live in a world now where we try to have to look at either you respect it or you don't but not Respecting it. I'm just saying not you I'm just saying in general with these with the way how dialogue is having to change Either you respect it, or there's consequences for not expecting to respect it. you know what? I get what the point you're making, but sometimes it gets a little bit too much. Because now you have people walking around telling people there's 10 different genders. It doesn't, It just doesn't make sense. on that note, Jesus. I ain't going there on this podcast, son. Yeah. I know, I get it, but people don't do it at a, people don't do stuff intentionally. It just doesn't, you know, know, people do stuff intentionally, but I think, just, you know, It's just, it's just a thing, bro. Like you don't, when me, you and Lee are hanging out or me, let's say all us four are hanging out and we at the bar, we're not going to act the same way at the bar and paddling around and wilding out than we do at work. Right. I'll be honest with you, I don't act like that way in the bar anymore. If I do But which way? No, I'm just saying we loosen up. We let our hair down. I'm not saying, I'm not saying we standing on the bar doing coyote ugly. I'm just saying we let our hair down and the corporate kind. I feel safe. With you guys that I can let my hair down and be my true self. That's all I'm saying. It's kind of funny because when I'm at my corporate functions, I don't drink. You can. drink at corporate alcohol. I mean, the corporate functions. I mean, it's, but again, again, I don't think anything's wrong with him not drinking at a corporate function, if that's a boundary he's established for himself. And Doc is not the kind of dude who gets pissy drunk anyway. Yeah. But the thing is though, I mean, usually I, I got when I, when I let loose and I gotta be around people. I'm comfortable and people who I know Right. That's right. Right. So, so that's the thing. You know, there are things that I'm not, I'm not going to cross the line with you three, Yeah. because I respect your boundaries. And if you tell me, Melissa, you don't like being lumped into mankind, I'm going to respect that because I love you. and I'll never say mankind again, Preach. No, that's not, I don't think you can never, you don't have to say never again. It's a, it's a boundary. It's a boundary for her. I know, but I've never heard womankind. I honestly never heard that in literature. Ask ChatGPT. Yes. I have it open right now. You know what the funny thing is, I've been using chat GPTA lot lately now, which is crazy. You should try the other one. Microsoft Pilot is ChatGPT on steroids. Is it that good? It's really good. Yeah. That's good. It's good. It's different in how it presents the information. I personally use both, and I paid the subscription for both. Yeah, I use both, but there's another one too called Claude You know what? I've used that. I've used that. I like that. I like that one. But, but, uh, but you, I think, I think they charged you for that. Claude is free. Okay. All right, the term womankind has traditionally been used collectively to refer to all women paralleling the use of mankind for all humanity. Doom, doom, But mankind is for all humanity? Did you hear that? So the one, the word, it seems like the word womankind was, let me see, however, But, for all humanity in 1922. Doom. Man, No. Mankind meant means all humanity. That's what they meaning by. nope. womankind is still understood and occasionally used, particularly in literary, poetic, A rhetorical context to evoke a sense of universal out universality among women. So it was created to create. So if, if, if humankind felt it was important enough to create it, the term womankind, then we should respect people who wants to be called womankind. you know what? And I get that, but when I use mankind, I mean, as an inclusive term for all people, I get it. We get that. That's all. That's it. what. You heard me. No, I didn't. I seriously didn't. Okay. All I meant it. We get it, brother. Okay. eighth time, Okay. Just making sure. Don't want to miss it. And Larry, stop laughing. laughing Larry That's at Larry. That's laughing Larry. right, this has been a great conversation why because what Lee Larry. What, because we topic? All right, we had no damn topic If you'd have got that question wrong, bro, I'd have been mad at you. I was sitting here looking at you like he better get that answer right. Oh. As always, guys, this was a great conversation and we are thankful to our listeners. And as always, I see you because I am you. Make sure to follow us on YouTube, Girl Talk Podcast,